it doesn't have to be like this

why does everything you say melt my heart?
i should really separate myself from you... it's going to start to be an issue soon.
i realize i can't have you.
why does that make me want you more?


" no, you shouldn't be in the middle. you deserve better than that."
thank you for that. i needed it.
but stop confusing me damnit!
ugh.

catch and release

writing greg that message let me finally get over him.
i've been holding on to whatever hope was there... and there wasn't much.
now i can finally get on with my life, which is what i've been waiting for

i wished for something i really needed last night at 11:11. i really hope it happens.

semi is tonight (: i'm actually supposed to be getting ready to go to emily's tonight.
i have a lot of expectations... i should probably limit them.
knowing me, i'll just end up being disappointed in the end anyway..

go ahead and hate on me haters, cuz i'm not afraid of. what i got i paid for, you can hate on me.
gLee ♥
can't wait for it to start up again.

ok, my music just got to the last one on shuffle... it's a sign.
i have to go.

stay true, stay you. don't be disappointed with what life hands you.

you blow my mind

so i said i would be my best in civics... that was a fail.
the midterm = the hardest test i've ever taken in my life.
but i admit that i didn't study as much as i could have.
i didn't even try. i just knew that i was going to fail and didn't do anything about it.
no i'm really scared to fail that class...

what i hate more than anything:
knowing that i didn't try.
being alone
going to semi without a date.
(i'm actually bringing jesus.. so strike that last thing.)

so i'm really not sure what to say anymore...
nothing meaningful is going on lately.
and i'll have to wait until it does.

oh! i sent greg a message to ask him a few things that bothered me.
now i'm paranoid everytime my inbox says: inbox (1)
but it's not him. ever.
but i just sent this like 2 days ago.
i'll give him the benefit of the doubt.

writer's block

so i have to write this speech for english.
it's supposed to be our own version of mlk's i have a dream speech.
my topic is keeping the art's department in schools.
i can't get all my thought in order... but this is a rough draft.
the draft is due wednesday, final friday.
my time management is nonexistent. and i realized that at the beginning of the year.
8th grade gave me bad habits. whatever..

so i'll be working on this speech and hopefully i won't get ADD moments.


sorry for being completely random again.

end rant/

resolutions

sorry about the complete randomness of my last blog.
and i promise i wasn't trying to mock anyone if that's what it seemed like.

this year's resolutions:
be myself; don't let anyone control my thoughts.
open up to people more often.
blog more (:
actually pass my civics midterm; because i'm going to do my best in that class now. (no more "trying my best." mrs. ferro's right... if you "try" your best you'll never be your best. you'll just say "oh, at least i tried.." no more.)
live up to people's expectations of me; but don't be afraid to fail.
stop judging.
and most importantly...
no regrets. ever.

and another thing... stop criticizing yourself.
sure, people will judge. you just have to love yourself.
and know that the people that like you, will like you. don't try to impress other people.

make 2010 the best year yet (:

"if we wish at 11:11 on 11/11/11, then on 12/21/12 we'll be ok." (:
oh yeah.. and stop joining so many groups on facebook!

happy new year (: